


Mix Tape

by alittlenutjob



Category: The Mindy Project
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-25
Updated: 2015-11-06
Packaged: 2018-01-20 17:54:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 15,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1519853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alittlenutjob/pseuds/alittlenutjob
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is basically the place where I put mini-fics that don't go anywhere else, so each chapter is a stand-alone story.<br/>As always I own nothing and write this with the greatest respect for the creators.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Independence Day

She'd been Danny's for 27 short days. It was only natural that things could drift back to some semblance of normalcy quickly. Kim Kardashian had been married longer, and over it in half the time. Mindy didn't know why this didn't feel the same as it did when Casey left, when anyone else left. She was going to get over this in record time, exactly like Kim. Exactly.

 

She could still work, which seemed like a sure sign of being able to get through this. The doctor was in. She ushered little people into the world, held the hands of women who'd surely dealt with a heartbreak or two before they arrived in this moment where they learned how to fall in love again for the first time, with tiny fingernails and sleepy eyes and little rosebud lips that would learn the words for mother all too soon. Mindy would be lying if she said she hadn't let her mind wander once or twice in 27 days to the day where she might fall in love with her own little someone. Wavy hair like his father, that Roman profile, her earthy and true skin, their combined tempers, their combined capacity for happiness. But she didn't feel anything as she handed over little miracles to warm and loving arms, not even sorrow. She hadn't lost anything that had really been hers to lose. It was only 27 days. She had real work to do.

 

As a surgeon, her time was never her own, something she'd accepted years ago. Meals were always at the wrong time, always either too much or too little. It was probably a contributor to that extra 15 lbs she wished would just disappear. Once upon a time she'd worried about it pretty steadily, but someone told her that looking like herself, looking like a woman, was a good thing. It didn't really matter, because she knew that she was powerful, beautiful and those 15 pounds were hers and hers alone to love or let go. All the same, when someone holds you close, all of you, when hot hands can't get enough of the thick flesh you'd undervalued until that moment, that matters. She can't even pretend she doesn't mourn the loss of it, that worshipful touch. But it would happen again someday. She hadn't eaten more than a couple of bites of food at any meal in some time and it was beginning to look like that last 15 might be gone by the time new hands learned her body. Maybe new hands wouldn't trace your too full belly with soft, soft circles like you were something beautiful to touch, but he had been the only one who liked to do that anyway. Lose 15 pound, gain 15 more, it wouldn't matter because one day she'd forget the way it felt, and her body would be her own again.

 

She did cry from time to time, in the closet. In the bedroom she just felt sickly embarrassment gnawing at her stomach, and a heavy unnamed feeling pushing her into the mattress. It was suffocating, but safe, in a way. Insomnia and strange sleep cycles were familiar. She'd try to pass this time in the quiet hours of the night when she should be resting by cataloging her wardrobe as she always had. But bright overhead light glittering off ripe colors and lush fabrics in the closet opened up something inside her that she couldn't push back down. Damn him for ruining this for her. Morgan was a heavy sleeper, but she'd crawl onto the fire escape to be safe and let it go. If you could see her from far away the shivers of an unusually cold spring and shaking silent sobs were almost indistinguishable from each other. This she could allow him. He and his 27 days and his friendship could have this. She would get over this.

 

Morgan told her, one night as she sat in front of uneaten food, that when she was in California he and Peter had caught Cliff listening to Jewel. It was kinda funny, and a little sweet. There was something about music from those teen years when heartache became a real part of your emotional landscape that made you return to it for healing. She'd turned to Sarah McLachlan, and he'd turned to Jewel. Maybe he had been the one, and Danny had just been a bump in her road back to Cliff. They could be happy. Cliff had gotten over his trust issues for her once, maybe he'd do it again. Then Danny would disappear in the rear view as she and her perfect, blue-eyed lawyer rode off into the sunset.

 

She'd stayed at the table long enough to be polite and moved the food around a bit to fool Morgan into thinking she'd eaten something. An early night, she'd said, morning rounds. She picked up her laptop and carried it to bed, thinking if she just played 'Building a Mystery' one more time she might be able to rekindle what she'd felt when she had been so heartbroken over Cliff. If she could return to that it would be like Danny never happened.

 

She didn't feel any further from tonight when she listened to Sarah again, but *NSync kind of helped. She had a little moment as she passed Aaliyah in the playlist, but she was back on track by the time she rediscovered No Doubt. She took a detour into some Britpop and came back out via a mix inspired by the one and only rave she'd attended. She remembered feeling terrified that Gwen was going to get addicted to drugs and being worried about the reading list she had waiting back at the dorm.

 

As 3am rolled around she'd settled firmly into a Lilith Fair situation when a long forgotten breakup sponsored by Ani DiFranco reared its ugly head. She couldn't remember the guy's last name and break up might not have been the right word for discovering he had a long term girlfriend after a semester of study dates and an awkward make out session in the library, but it had hurt all the same.

 

Mindy closed her laptop and tried to hold on to that old hurt. A semester was a lot longer than 27 days. This was just fresh, not worse. What was it he'd said? “You never know a love song until you have a broken heart.” That's all this was. She would get over this. Any day now.

 

_You can't leave me here. I got your back now, and you'd better have mine 'cause you say the coast is clear, but you say that all the time._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ani DiFranco, 'Independence Day'  
> This was a piece to work on breaking writer's block. It's a little stream-of-consciousness, but I am happy with the way it came out anyway.


	2. Missing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danny's mix tape track. As always it's not entirely about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything but the Girl, 'Missing'

Jeremy looked... happy. That was the worst part. He'd just told Mindy off for dating around the office only weeks ago, and now he was falling back into that same habit. Danny had carefully avoided the topic of Jeremy and Mindy's.... arrangement... when they were together, but he knew that it hadn't meant anything to Jeremy. And it had meant something to Mindy. The very idea that she could rebound like this... The idea that Jeremy was letting it happen made him feel sick.

Danny should have known better than to say yes to another office club night, but all eyes had focused on him and he'd caved. Well, almost all eyes. The way Mindy dodged him that morning should have been some sort of hint as to how painful this would be. Actually, fuck that. This was so much worse. If she'd just picked up another sports lawyer, or danced a little with Betsy and Morgan he could have given the night 90 minutes of halfhearted effort and ducked out to go home and lick his wounds. Instead she leaned into Jeremy's shoulder, a throaty laugh winding through the crowd at the bar.

He clutched his glass, melting ice doing nothing to improve the bourbon. How many had he had now? The room swam, but it wasn't like intoxication, it was like that fucked up falling feeling you get that wakes you in the night. He tried to breathe slowly, but the pumping music and Mindy's hand tracing Jeremy's thigh made his heart pound. He was pissed off. He was crushed. He was a little turned on. He had to get out of here.

“Dr Castellano, do you want to dance?” Betsy's voice hopeful, her face open and he could see how easily he could crush her. He was so tempted to lash out so someone in this fucking club would feel even half as destroyed as he felt right this moment.

“Sure, Bets.” No one talked about that night when Betsy declared her love for him, but he hoped he could gently direct her towards friendship and save her unnecessary pain. Because that had gone so well for him lately.

Betsy was not a graceful dancer, but she was enthusiastic. He was careful to make minimum contact, just friends. She seemed happy enough until she caught him glancing one time too many back at the bar. “Dr Castellano, what's wrong?”

“Nothing Betsy. I just thought... I thought we were instituting a no intraoffice dating policy.”

Oh,” Betsy said so quietly he didn't really hear it, but he could read in on her face.

As her face fell his heart lurched. He'd seen that look so recently and it made him even more aware of how badly he'd hurt his best friend. And how unfairly he'd dismissed Betsy's feelings. He just ruined everything for everyone. He put his hands on her arms gently. “Betsy, I'm sorry. I very flattered that you feel so strongly about me. You're great and I wish I could return the feeling. I'm sorry I can't and I hope you will still want to be my friend.”

Her eyes glistened as she swallowed hard and nodded. “Thank you for saying that. I hope one day we can be friends too.” She ducked her head and he saw the first tears fall as she made her way past the bar, presumably towards the ladies room. Jeremy and Mindy both looked up and Jeremy patted Mindy's arm before taking off to trail behind Betsy, through the club.

Mindy marched toward him as he stood there like a broken toy. His brain told him to run, but his legs wouldn't let him. “What did you do to her, Danny?”

“I just... I told her I wanted to be her friend.” Even under the strobing lights, even under her perfectly applied makeup, he could see the color drain from her face. He wanted to explain, but he didn't know what to say that wouldn't make it worse.

She swallowed and licked her lips. “Of course.”

“Mindy...”  
  
“I think you should go.” she said firmly.  
  
“I will go, I promise, but would you please talk to me?” he begged.  
  
“What do you want to talk about, Danny? I have yet to see any of the benefits of being your 'best friend' so why now? You want to tell me how you destroyed another woman's heart in the name of friendship?”

“Destroyed?” he whispered. She couldn't have possibly heard it in this melee, but her face crumpled briefly before she could hide it.

He took her arm and pulled her gently to the edge of the crowd. It still wasn't quiet enough. He led her to the coat check, which was blissfully unattended and pulled her into the back where they could hear each other. They just stood there, unable to look at each other as music filtered in to expand in the uncomfortable silence between them. She smiled sadly. “I used to love this song”

He tilted his head and strained to hear it clearly. “Yeah? I don't know it.”

“Everything but the Girl.”

He closed his eyes for a second to catch the lyrics, but they slipped away from him. When he opened his eyes again she was staring at him. He took a deep breath. “You don't love it anymore though?”

“I don't know. Maybe I do. I guess I just moved on to other things.”

“Like Jeremy?”

She raised her eyebrows. “I beg your pardon?”

“Mindy... I know I don't have any right...”

She cut him off. “You don't. You don't have any right to my personal life.”

“It's just, it's just that he wasn't good to you. You deserve more.

“I had 'more' for a minute, Danny. Then 'more' dumped me too. I really think you should drop this.”

“Mindy, I didn't mean to hurt you. I just want to go back to when we could talk to each other. I want my friend back.”

“It's not as simple as that, is it?”

“It is as simple as that,” he insisted. He wanted so badly to grab her hands.

“Maybe I don't want to be your friend.” She looked directly into his eyes, sadness emanating from her, or maybe it was just reflecting from the desperation he knew he gave off in waves.

“Why not?” He could feel her breath on his neck. Why wasn't she wearing heels? She was that perfect height like this, she'd fit so perfectly against him. If she were still his. He felt like she wanted to say more, but he couldn't get past his gut reaction, all the air sucked out of the room, his stomach clenched tight.

“What you you doing back here?” They both turned, jolted out of the moment by the person who was probably supposed to be manning this coat check when they snuck in only minutes ago.

“I, uh, I needed my coat.” Danny muttered awkwardly and looked around, spotting the plain brown leather easily against all the flashier, more stylish coats. He pulled it down and handed the girl the check ticket, ducking as he pushed past her. He caught one last glimpse of Mindy before he reached the door, her lips pursed unhappily, her eyes bright with unshed tears. In the open club he finally caught a lyric as he turned and rushed out to meet the cool evening air with tears of his own threatening to ruin everything all over again. Shoving his hands into his pockets, Danny walked away.

_And I miss you, like the deserts miss the rain._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a not-so-subtle nod to My Mad Fat Diary, just because of reasons. Also, it's a nice song.


	3. Wildest Moments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A dinner party at Colin and Anna's, because why not.  
> Music: Wildest Moments, Jessie Ware

"We're not gonna do this, Mindy. Just pick some shoes and let's go."

"Danny, stop trying to rush me. You know if I pick the wrong ones you'll be the one who pays all night when I can't walk fast enough to keep up with you."

"Or you could just buy normal shoes."

"Define normal."

"Not that," he grumbled as he pointed at the painfully high heels she was pulling on.

"Danny, these shoes make my legs look longer, and my ass look amazing."

"You don't need any help with that." He swatted at her behind playfully.

"You perv. I guess it could be worse." A mischievous look crept across Mindy's face. "I'll let you rub my feet later."

Danny rolled his eyes. "This again? I said that thing about your feet ONE TIME and you won't let it go."

"You said you like pretty feet on no less than 3 occasions."

"How in the hell can you forget where you put the valet ticket 3 times in a single week, but I say one thing..."

"Three things," she interrupted.

"...about your pedicure and you pop up to remind me about it fortnightly."

"Aww, Danny, you called it a pedicure."

"I know what a pedicure is."

"And where the hell did fortnightly come from? Hast thou been to see the Queen recently?"

"You're changing the subject. Get your shoes on and let's go. I'm not gonna be late to this party."

"Hold thee horses, lil Shakespeare."

Danny's face split into a wide grin at the stupid nickname. "It's thy, not thee. Now let's move."

. . .

 

They arrived 45 minutes late, which in Mindy's opinion was a perfectly acceptable delay when hot footwear was on the line, but Danny looked positively sheepish as they ducked in late and handed Colin their coats. "Sorry we're so late, man."

"It's not a problem. I've never known Mindy to turn up on time for anything if there wasn't a waffle bar." Anna as always was dry and to the point.

"Excuse you. You don't know that I wasn't rushing out of surgery just to get here to your lame party..."

"Mindy, could you maybe not pick a fight with our host?" Danny turned to the other couple again with an apologetic look. "I'm sorry, guys. Thank you for inviting us."

"Thanks for coming. We didn't know if this..." Colin gestured between Danny and Mindy with one finger, "was still happening. We may need to re-arrange some seating."

Danny frowned, but appeared to let it go as he spotted Jeremy hovering in the kitchen door, drink in hand. "Well, thanks for asking us, I get that we can kinda be... a distraction."

Danny put his hand in the small of Mindy's back, hot and undoubtedly sweaty, but reassuring as he led her across the room.

"Slow down," Mindy hissed as she stumbled a bit.

"The shoes? I told you to wear normal shoes."

"And I told you these are normal shoes."

"Why can't you walk at a normal speed?"

"Hey, just because you were in a rush to get away from them doesn't mean I'm not walking at a normal speed."

"I wasn't in a rush to get away from them, I was in a rush to get you away from them."

"Are you embarrassed of me?"

"When you pick fights with our host, yeah, kinda."

"Are you kidding? Anna started it!"

"Anna pointed out that you're always late, which was kinda right."

"She brought waffles into this!" Mindy's raised voice attracted a little attention, but she was already invested in this new argument and not about to give ground when she hadn't even been the first to fire.

“Are you two going to bicker all night?” Jeremy asked as they approached.

“No,” Danny insisted while Mindy simultaneously barked an irritated “Yes.”

“Come on, you've been doing so well. I haven't heard a row in the office in almost a week.”

“We don't fight that much, do we?” The corners of Mindy's mouth turned down slightly as she thought again about Colin's statement about seating arrangements. Did their friends really not think they could make this work?

“You kind of do,” Jeremy said lightly.

For the first time since they arrived Mindy slipped her hand into Danny's. He smiled at her, but she could see a bit of her own worry reflected in his eyes. This was their first big party as a couple, a debut of sorts, and she'd already started off on the wrong foot. She gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. “I'll be right back.”

She found Anna on her own in the dining room, fussing with namecards. “Hey, Anna.”

“Hi.”

Mindy's lips formed a thin line as she formulated her apology. “I'm sorry we were so late. And I'm sorry, we messed with your seating plan.”

“Are you okay?” Anna looked genuinely concerned.

“What? I'm fine.” Mindy knew damn well Anna was surprised by an apology and fought her instinct to say something snarky in response. She swallowed hard and continued. “Anna, this is kind of a big deal for us, me and Danny. I just wanted to look more put together than I feel.”

Anna sat in one of the seats and gestured for Mindy to join her. “What do you mean?”

“Well, you guys didn't know if we'd still be happening by the time you threw this party. We know that people look at us and see two people who don't really fit together. I hoped tonight we could basically show everyone that we're serious this time. It's real.”

“Hey,” Anna took her hand lightly. “No one thinks that.”

Mindy raised her eyebrows without comment.

“Okay, some people think that. Colin and I have known the both of you a long time now though. We've wondered for years when you two were finally going to figure it out.”

“You could have told us, saved me a lot of terrible dates.”

“Would you have listened?”

“No, I'd have told you that you needed to see a shrink.”

“Right. And it didn't matter, because you have finally figured it out.”

“Have we though?” Mindy bit her lip. “We can't even make it through one evening without fighting. Danny was afraid of this, that we'd never get over the fights. That we'd just end up fighting more and more until there wasn't anything left to save.”

“Are you afraid of that?” Anna asked honestly.

“Sometimes.”

“Well, take it from an old married woman, some fighting is part of the deal. As long as you both still want the same thing at the end of the day the little fights don't add up to anything. You two clearly care about each other and always have, just make that the foundation you build on.”

Mindy nodded. “Thanks, Anna.”

Anna stood, smoothing down her dress and looking around the dining room. “Well, it's time for dinner, and I know how you love to announce...”

“Dinner is served!” Mindy shouted into the living room.

Anna shook her head, eyes wide with disbelief. “I was joking!”

. . .

 

Danny laughed, a lot. Mindy ate from his plate, a lot. For once, a meal passed with the minimum of fork stabbing, and plenty of wine to ease any tension lingering from their earlier public display. Possibly too much wine as Mindy's bladder was about to burst, and as she stood to excuse herself she realized she was definitely too tipsy for heels this high. Why had he let her out of the house wearing them? “Danny, could you help me with something?”

His head tilted, indicating his confusion at the request, but he stood anyway and murmured to the party, “Excuse us for a moment.”

As they made their way toward the back hallway Mindy giggled as she tried to mimic his deep voice. “'Excuse us for a moment.' Danny you have such nice manners. You're very formal tonight. Very classy.”

“No I'm not. I just don't want everyone to think we're gonna go have a quickie in the bathroom.”

“How do you know that's not what I want?”

“Well, for starters, you're walking like a duck. I know you have to pee.”

“Hey, I'm very graceful. I'm a swan.”

Danny continued as they reached their destination, ignoring her waterfowl diversion. “Not to mention you and I have basically the worst luck in bathrooms. We shouldn't even try.”

“Spoilsport.” Mindy ducked into the bathroom, and despite the heels and the bottle or two of wine coursing through her body managed to complete her visit without untoward incident. When she stepped out of the bathroom though Danny wasn't in the hall where she'd left him. “Dan?”

“I'm in here.”

Mindy followed his voice down the hallway, making her way slowly on unsteady feet like a baby deer. She found him in the room closest to the master bedroom, standing in the near dark. He held his hand out to her, but as she approached her heel caught the edge of a carpet. She pulled him with her as she tumbled, and to Mindy's horror she realized that they'd attracted something else as they fell fall. Dozens of _hairy_ things brushed against bare skin, stuck in her hair, skittered across the floor. Mindy screamed.

“Oh shit, oh shit,” Danny joined in. She'd landed partially on him and she'd already guessed he was less worried about whatever was attacking them and more worried about the fact that an entire dinner party was about to find them tangled on the floor after excusing themselves from the table.

Colin was the first to arrive, flipping the light on and glancing behind him in panic. “Please tell me you two weren't hooking up in our nursery.”

“Nursery?” Mindy looked around the now well-lit room at the partially assembled changing table and the dozens of stuff animals that she'd mistaken for rabid raccoons that surrounded them where they'd landed on the floor.

As the rest of the group trickled in Colin helped Danny up, then Mindy. Anna followed, the last to arrive. “Surprise. The adoption went through. We were going to tell everyone tonight, but...”

A blush began at Danny's collar and crept up towards his ears, and Mindy felt her own face getting hot as she stammered an apology. “I'm so sorry. Not about the baby. I mean, congratulations. I mean...”

Anna held her hands up. “It's fine. We were ready to tell everyone, and this will make a fun story later.”

Mindy grabbed Anna and hugged her tight. Anna finally let her calm slip and her excitement shone through as she hugged Mindy back. Mindy slipped her hand into Danny's and grinned. "Congratulations. If you ever need a babysitter..."

Anna returned the grin. "We'll call anyone but you."

Mindy sighed with relief. "Thank God."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sloppy nonsense put together in an evening because of something someone said on tumblr. Feedback always gratefully received and I'm on http://alittlenutjob.tumblr.com/ if you need me.


	4. Vanessa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Danny and Vanessa knew each other, if they knew each other at all.

Vanessa wasn’t her real name. She told him the second time they met. Well, what she’d said was “Holy shit, guys don’t usually do that for me.” and he’d replied that he wasn’t most guys. “Yeah, I get that from you,” she’d said. “But you know I’m a sure thing. You don’t have to prime the engine as it were.”

“Why wouldn’t I? You deserve more than an in-and-out job,” he’d insisted, the blush beginning at the back of his neck and creeping forward.

“Danny you’re a nice guy, but you don’t really know me,” she’d said.

“I don’t think anyone really knows me,” he’d replied. They’d ended up spending the night together, really spending the night together, and she’d said the thing about her name. He’d seemed so grateful, for that little bit of honesty and so completely incapable of reciprocity that she knew he’d never ask for her name, and he’d never tell her anything real either. For all the wrong reasons she hoped as the sun rose that he’d forgotten both that she would never know him either, and why.

The arrangement emerged out of necessity (his not hers) and once they’d established a routine he could let it be exactly what it was (a transaction of sorts) and what it wasn’t (a relationship) – out of necessity. Every Thursday night she’d meet him in the same place, and they’d have the same drinks and the same conversation (more or less. He talked about his job. She didn’t.) Then they’d end up at his place; she’d switch to fruit juice and he’d have another scotch or two. Luckily she wasn’t really the type to take it personally that he had to be halfway into a bottle to finally strip down in front of her. She had no such qualms, and between the two of them they would end the evening the way they’d both anticipated. He was quiet, but she’d known quiet men before. And after.

She knew that every time they met was part of a countdown, to what she didn’t know, but she knew it all the same. He knew she had a real name, and she knew she was a stand-in for someone and one day the illusion would shatter, leaving them with nothing else to say.

In the end, it wasn’t her name that ground the train to a halt.

Mindy. He’d always talked casually about work, but at some point the talk shifted from his work to his co-workers to his co-worker, and she knew from the way he said the name that it was time to step out of the equation. As long as he kept meeting her on Thursday nights he wouldn’t do anything else about his Friday nights and his Saturday night and his Sunday mornings and his Christmases and his forever.

“It’s been fun,” she’d said, leaving a light smear of lipstick on his cheek as she paid for her own drink. He looked a little surprised, and nodded. “Danny, do one thing for me?”

“Sure.”

“Let someone get to know you.”


	5. Try Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A random thing I wrote for an anon ages ago, but hadn't added to the collection. Sorry to get your hopes up!
> 
> _Oh could you write something to further the line of thoughts and reasoning running through Danny's mind after his conversation with Cliff? and also I really your angsty fics so please maybe more about that? :P Thanks in advance_

Danny Castellano is the kind of happy that he didn’t think would ever happen to him again. He’s the kind of happy that feels like you’re about to spin off the planet out into the cosmos and you wouldn’t even care. Every minute of the day that he used to spend hoping maybe she could want or need him the way he wants and needs her he now spends knowing that she’ll be back in his arms as soon as she can possibly get to him. She’s absolutely, positively permeating every aspect of his life and he loves it.

But he’s afraid of it too. When he let himself be this happy before, the fracturing of that relationship almost shattered him too. There are nights where he stares into the dark and listens to her breathe and feels like he’s about to spin off the planet; he’s just so terrified that it could be over in the blink of an eye. So he draws these stupid lines, like they could possibly give him some modicum of control over his life. Don’t leave your things here, don’t even try to get to know my mom ‘cause she’ll hate you.

He pushes and waits for the push back, the little sign that she wants to fight for this. Instead she makes a face he doesn’t really understand and walks away again, and when the door shuts behind her he feels even more empty and adrift. 

Then.  _Then._  Cliff Gilbert looks around Danny’s pristine, Mindyless apartment and says there’s no sign of her here.

It’s such a foolish thing to say. When Danny looks around he sees her everywhere - sleeping on his sofa with a bowl of melting ice cream in her hand, tinkering on his piano wearing nothing but panties and one of his tees, trying awkwardly to do yoga in front of the TV (which isn’t even on a yoga programme, she’s watching House Hunters International) and… Danny knows that he’s the fool here, not Cliff. It shouldn’t have taken this long for him to figure this out. 

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

It is so fucking  _stupid_  that it took someone outside of their relationship to show him what it really looked like, but if loving Mindy Lahiri has taught him anything at all, it’s that  **being the best version of yourself isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being willing to try again.**

So he tries again.


	6. Jealous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the [The Mindy Project Fanfic Extravaganza, State of the Union edition](http://alittlenutjob.tumblr.com/post/108847153982/the-mindy-project-fanfic-extravaganza-state-of)  
> 1 of 3.
> 
> _Prompt: Anonymous asked: Jealous Danny fanfic !_

Danny closed the door softly behind him, holding his keys tight in his hand so the jingle wouldn’t give him away. She’d been cagey last night before he’d left for his overnight on-call, and the last couple of texts went unanswered. Maybe Mindy thought he’d be tired, slumping over on the disgusting lounge sofa after a flurry of deliveries. Maybe she thought he wouldn’t notice. He couldn’t bring himself to actually call, but when Jeremy came in and offered to take the last 3 hours of the shift Danny jumped at the chance. “You look awful, mate,” Jeremy had murmured with a concerned look. They’d kind of become friends again when Mindy had been away in Stanford, and as hard as it was for Danny to admit it, he needed that right now. 

Danny would never get used to the new way of fighting. She’d stopped arguing a point until it was ground into dust. She kept her voice low and her eyes lower. He knew that they couldn’t stay the same people they were on top of the Empire State Building, and he didn’t want that, but he’d hoped for just a little more time before he became a part of the scenery. He’d admitted as much to Richie in a moment of weakness, and Richie had clapped him on the back soundly. “I don’t know why you always think she’s gonna leave you behind. Mindy ain’t Christina, Danny.”

Danny reminded himself of that again, how his life now and his life then were completely different, but sneaking through the house towards a closed bedroom door would always make him feel like an interloper in his own house. He held his breath as he pushed the door open. 

There they were, asleep. His Mindy was curled on her side, one arm stretched out so their fingers touched. Her eyes flew open and Danny’s heart skipped a beat. “Dan?”

"I should have known." He kicked his shoes off, pulled his top over his head and threw it at the chair in the corner. "You’re gonna spoil her."

"Whatever, Danny," Mindy whispered. "You can’t spoil babies. She wanted to sleep in here." 

"She’s 6 weeks old. She doesn’t care where she sleeps." He crawled into the bed beside Mindy and sighed heavily.

"You weren’t here. You don’t know." Mindy turned toward him, placing a tiny kiss on his bottom lip, pulling away too quickly for him to respond.

"I know how you are when it comes to this baby. You spend every waking minute staring at her, and now she’s sleeping in here too."

"Are you jealous?"

"Jealous, I’m not jealous! Of a baby? Pfft." It comes out a little louder (and a lot whinier) than he’d intended and the new addition to their home lets out a tiny mewl, not unlike the way her mother chirps in her sleep. Danny and Mindy both freeze, waiting to see if that mewl is going to turn into something more. 

When the coast is clear they relax into each other a bit and Mindy burrows in, her lips pressed to his chest, a sleepy sigh fluttering through his chest hair. “You’re jealous of a baby.”

"Maybe a little," he admits as he buries his face in her hair and breathes her in. 

"Oh?" Mindy says, sleep making her words thick like honey. He knows he only has her for another minute or two before she’s gone. 

"Yeah."

Mindy tilts her face up, her eyes heavy lidded, but lips curled into a smile. “I’m jealous of her too.”

"Why?"

"Because you, Daniel Castellano, are a great dad."

He feels his cheeks get hot as he lets those few, simple words wash over him. He didn’t ever think his life would be like this, but who really expects how their life is going to turn out?

"I’m gonna try," he whispers into the quiet room as the two most important people in his life sleep under his careful watch. "I’m gonna try."


	7. Frozen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the [The Mindy Project Fanfic Extravaganza, State of the Union edition](http://alittlenutjob.tumblr.com/post/108847153982/the-mindy-project-fanfic-extravaganza-state-of)  
> 2 of 3.
> 
>  
> 
> _Anonymous asked: Prompt: What if Danny and Mindy hadn't pulled apart when the elevator opened in the cold open of FMYI? Cliff and Morgan see them together. She doesn't take Cliff back over his grand gesture. Perhaps some awkwardness followed by going back to Mindy's apartment? Smut optional. -tainted_silver_

"Forget ice, just bring me a popsicle!" Mindy’s voice echoes a little as it floats through the apartment. She’d gone straight to the bathroom, refusing to let Danny check her out before she could see the damage herself. When she emerges to meet him on the sofa, her face is washed clean, which somehow makes the angry swelling more obvious.

"Mindy, promise me you don’t eat this garbage." Danny hands her something violently blue that came from a box with cartoon characters on the cardboard flap. "There’s no nutrition in these."

"I don’t buy them for the nutrition." Mindy unwraps the popsicle the wrong way, ripping at the bottom and tossing the wrapper onto the table. He resists the urge to point out that if she just opened it at the top the wrapper would catch any drips that fell as the popsicle melted. “We should have gone to your place.”

"Maybe. You were in a hurry though." His face flushes as he remembers the cab ride home. A little lingering embarrassment (and a lot of lingering chemical smell in her hair) had stopped them short of doing something he’d have had to pay the cabbie extra to forget, but once they hit the elevator all bets were off. The same hands that had been soft and warm as he’d helped her from the cab and let her to the building were quick and precise the moment they were truly alone.

"I wasn’t the only one, buddy." Mindy lets her fingers skim the edge of his hand. They’re a little cold, but dry. To her credit she’d caught every single stray drip with the tip of her tongue as she ate her makeshift ice pack. Danny shifts uncomfortably, painfully aware of quite how phallic that stupid blue popsicle is and how close they’d come to a very different ending before her ex-boyfriend crashed the party. “Be nice to me, I have a busted lip.”

"I said I’m sorry."

Mindy touches her face gingerly again and sucks in a sharp breath. “Ow.”

He wants so desperately to pick up where they’d left off before the elevator doors opened and he’d come within 8 seconds of an awkward orgasm in front of a mariachi band. Not the over-the-pants-but-under-the-shirt position they’d been in, just the kissing. He’d been waiting on long time. “Eat your popsicle.”

"So… are you staying over?" She smiles and shoves it deep in her mouth, moaning a little as she sucks. He revises the previous position as his dick stirs to life. Maybe a little more over-the-pants.

"Do you want me to stay over? I thought you’d want a break from me, after everything…"

"You shouldn’t have swung for him."

"And he should have kept his mouth shut."

"In his defense he had just caught us banging in an elevator."

"We weren’t banging!" Danny protests feebly. They weren’t, but he’ll have a hard time justifying in confession this week why he’d been pressed tight between her legs as she moaned rhythmically and the world started getting a little blurry around the edges. It wasn’t sex, but it was some sort of sin. Maybe a couple of sins. "And don’t defend him. He’s an ass."

"I guess." Mindy shrugs. "I mean, I kinda cheated on him."

"He broke up with you. No one cheated on anyone."

"And you wrote him a letter convincing him to stay." Mindy stands and pads over to drop the popsicle stick into the sink. He wonders if he’ll ever get used to the casual chaos she causes, but decides it doesn’t matter, not right now.

"Sorry."

"Don’t be." She tosses another casual smile his way and he feels it all the way to his fingertips. Maybe he’s not ready for over-the-pants or even the kissing if the way he feels right now can be caused by a smile.

"Are you staying or not?"

"Yeah, I’ll stay."

She looks for a second like she might return to the sofa, but the little smile gets a lot bigger and she pulls her sweater over her head, dropping it on the floor. “Good.”


	8. Danny and Mindy and Charlie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the [The Mindy Project Fanfic Extravaganza, State of the Union edition](http://alittlenutjob.tumblr.com/post/108847153982/the-mindy-project-fanfic-extravaganza-state-of)  
> 3 of 3.
> 
>  
> 
> _evmlove asked: Fic prompt: because you write Charlie so well (i.e. you don't make me hate him like I normally do), Charlie finding out about Mindy and Danny in a really hilarious but embarrassing way (for example: because they got arrested for doing it on the subway)_

"I told you not to let the rich kid mess you around. Look where you are now."

Charlie’s voice had the exact timbre that could only ever be described as “disappointed father,” and despite himself Danny felt a sharp little tug in his chest.

Alan Castellano hadn’t stuck around long enough to use that disappointed dad voice often, not that Danny could remember. Maybe on a holiday Danny could almost remember what it was like to have a dad. Maybe when he was a little tired and a little drunk and his guard was down, but not really. His heart remembered though. And it pissed him off. “Don’t talk to her like that.”

"I’ll deal with you in a minute." Charlie turned away, his voice softer as he knelt to meet Mindy’s eyes. "Sorry. I shoulda asked. You okay?"

The wild tangle of Mindy’s hair bobbed as she nodded tearfully. Danny wanted to reach out and smooth it down for her but the handcuffs were in the way. She sniffled loudly and his heart ached.

Charlie rolled his eyes. “You know I know you’re just trying to cry your way out of charges, right?”

Mindy let out an exasperated sigh. “Damnit!”

A crooked smile stole across Charlie’s face before he shook his head and leaned down to unlock the cuffs from Mindy’s hands. “Relax, they’re not gonna press charges.”

"Really?" Mindy rubbed her wrists miserably, then tried to comb her hair down with her fingers.

"Yeah. It’s your first offense, they just wanna make sure you don’t do it again."

"We won’t. I swear."

"I know you won’t. ‘Cause if you try to use my name to get out of it again I’ll make sure they do press charges."

"Charlie!"

"You know better. And this guy knows better." He waved vaguely in Danny’s direction. "Come on, I’ll take you to sign out your personal property."

"What about Danny?" She looked back at Danny with wide eyes and a frown.

"Don’t worry about Danny. We’re gonna have a little talk and then he’ll be right out."

Mindy’s brow wrinkled as she stared at Charlie thoughtfully then gave a curt nod.

"Mindy!" She caught Danny’s eye one last time and flashed him a smile before Charlie ushered her away, leaving him alone at Charlies desk, trapped. As the hard plastic chair numbed his ass he listened to two older ladies shout at a detective in rapid furious Spanish somewhere behind him. Danny couldn’t remember enough Spanish to actually follow the whole conversation, but it sounded like the detective’s answers weren’t gonna cut it.

According to the clock on the wall with the crack along the bottom of the face Charlie was only gone two minutes, and it was only the presence of handcuffs that made Danny swallow some choice words about being left behind. Charlie pulled his chair around to the side of the desk close to Danny, but made no move to uncuff him. “I told her not to mess with you.”

"I heard." Danny hated how petulant he sounded, but something about the guy brought it out in him. "You gonna take these handcuffs off?"

"In a minute." Charlie frowned. "You don’t seem like a bad guy. Got a fancy job, but I bet you still go back to the island for Sunday dinner. What would they say back on Staten?"

Danny huffed angrily. “It’s nobody’s business.”

"It’s nobody’s business at home. It’s in the blotter when you get caught at Yankee Stadium." Charlie unlocked the handcuffs and dropped them on the cover of a blue notebook. "You know why I warned her off you, right?"

"No."

"You’re weak."

Danny wrung some feeling back into his hands. “Screw you.”

"I know about the way you broke up with her. I watched you try to weasel your way back into her life. You run when it gets hard, and you only wanna be part of her life when it’s on your terms. You make Mindy weak.”

Danny’s head shot up and he stared the older man down. “If you think Mindy’s weak, I feel sorry for you, because you don’t really know her. She’s the strongest person I know aside from my Ma and she’s smarter than you and me both. She doesn’t need you looking out for her.”

Charlie regarded Danny shrewdly for a moment, then the sternness of his face slowly melted away, replaced with a slow smile. Charlie clapped him on the back, maybe a little harder than necessary, but Danny knew it was as close to approval as Charlie would ever offer. "As long as you know that."


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the [The Mindy Project Fanfic Extravaganza, State of the Union edition, bonus edition!](http://alittlenutjob.tumblr.com/post/108847153982/the-mindy-project-fanfic-extravaganza-state-of)  
> 1 of 3.
> 
>  
> 
> _Anonymous asked: Fic prompt. Mindy's thoughts while re-watching Danny's Ken Burns documentary again at home, feeling bad, and wondering where Danny is and why he left the party. Then after he gives her the letter, conversation between them as they watch the film together, and it really hits him again how long she's loved him._

She smelled just a little of buttered popcorn.

Mindy was almost asleep, laying almost on top of him, heavy and warm, her words getting breathier and less precise as she drifted. He’d been a little hopeful that the letter might lead to some sex, but as stroked her back and listened to her breathing even out he let it go. They had time.

The remote control dug into his back where they’d kind of sunk into the couch together making plans for Stanford - what they would do if she got the fellowship, what it would mean for the practice. They’d carefully skirted around what it meant for the two of them, and he didn’t dare bring up what it meant for him. He’d always thought she was easy to read, but he was learning quickly that he’d always been wrong.

He reached under to pull the remote control out, hitting the power button and skipping back to restart the DVD. As the music began again he remembered that he’d never said thank you. She’s gotten Ken Burns to do this, she’d talked to all their friends, all his family. She’d even reached out to Christina as it happened, although Christina’s comments were brief and critical. He wondered why he’d ever thought he and Christina could be something again. No wonder he’d ended up putting so much of himself into those letters to Haiti. He just wished he’d known then that Mindy had felt the change between them too.

Her hair was soft against his cheek as he pulled her tighter against him. Maybe Stanford would be good for them. He was always better on paper, less prone to make stupid assumptions, and more prone to say something the right way. The real way. The way he had when she went to Haiti. He turned his face into her hair and breathed in her movie-theater scent. They definitely had time.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the [The Mindy Project Fanfic Extravaganza, State of the Union edition, bonus edition!](http://alittlenutjob.tumblr.com/post/108847153982/the-mindy-project-fanfic-extravaganza-state-of)  
> 2 of 3.
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> 
> _mindycray17 asked: Id like to make a request for some lovely smut. Mayb finish the scene at the end of stanford. Or the scene where Mindy is telling danny stop packing. A lil angst leading to smut ;)! Make up sex is always great!_

Mindy stops his hand as it sneaks under her scrub top and he fingers the drawstring on her scrubs. “I didn’t know you were coming back. I’m wearing my granny panties.”

One quick tug undoes them and he’s already in her panties as he whispers, “I don’t care.”  
She sucks in a breath and pulls away from him. “I do! This is our last night together for a while. I wanted to leave you with something to remember me by.” She rests her hand lightly on the crotch of his jeans, pleasantly surprised with how quickly he’s gotten revved up. “For the crank bank.”

“What?” Danny’s eyes are a little unfocused and it makes her smile.

“You know what I mean.”

“Oh.” He pulls her back to him, this time pushing her scrubs down and little more as he dives back into them. “Well you’ve been in the crank bank for years, don’t worry about it.”

“Seriously? How long? When you saw me in the steam room?” It’s getting hard to concentrate as he cups her ass so he can hold her still and grind into her, the circular motion precise and intense for two people still wearing so many clothes. She tugs his shirt out of his jeans and starts to unbutton it when he gets impatient and strips it off himself.

Danny rolls onto his back and positions her on top of him with a lazy smile. Her shirt is flying across the room and she doesn’t even have time to feel self conscious about the plain sports bra before it’s on the floor too. “Longer. You remember back when you and Jeremy kinda broke things off?”

“My breast exam? I knew it!” The irony of the situation, his confession that he’s been jerking off to the memory of her tits for years at this exact moment when he’s got one in his mouth makes her desperate to tweet something about it, but she can’t think straight when he does that thing with his teeth. “Fuck.”

“Not that,” he murmurs and shifts her. She’s on her back again as he finally peels down her scrubs and underwear together and stuffs them between the bed and the wall. His jeans and underwear are the next to go.

“Wait, what?”

He’s crouched between her thighs and she’s halfway to heaven when he looks up. “You sent me this picture of your Halloween costume. The mail lady?”

Mindy catches his head before he can go back to what he was doing. “Are you kidding me? You jerked off to me dressed as a government employee. How about the DMV? You wanna see me behind bulletproof glass? I can’t believe how much money I spend on La Perla when I could just put on a black jumpsuit like I’m picking up the garbage.”

“Hey, the US Postal Service is an American institution. Look at how big the country is and how they deliver to anywhere.” Danny takes the pause in oral activity to position himself over her. His lips are still wet, but he’s grinning that stupid half-grin as he pushes into her. “That’s how great America can be.”

This America rant happens mid-sex so often that she’s starting to get legitimately turned on in inappropriate places these days, like baseball games and the Staten Island Ferry. “You are so weird.”

He’s panting as he licks her neck and she would swear he’s getting harder inside her as he slams into her like he’s making a point. “And you are so hot. That costume was pretty tight. we didn’t really know each other then, but it was…inspirational.”

She turns him, holding him in place as they roll and she speeds up, eyes closed as she listens to his groans. “How about now? Feeling inspired now?”

“Fuck, Min.” His hands are on her breasts again as she comes, squeezing hard as her body clenches him and a moan is forced from her throat. Holy fuck she will miss this.

She locks eyes with him and rolls her hips as she rides him, careful to avoid too much direct contact just yet, but if she’s timed this right he’ll only be seconds behind her. Leaning down, she sucks his earlobe into her mouth and nips hard, and his eyes are rolling back in his head as he pulses inside her.

They separate long enough to get cleaned up and he turns the light off before crawling under the covers with her. It hardly seems worth arguing about which side of the bed she wants tonight; she just wants to fall asleep in his arms one last time before he goes. She runs her fingers through his chest hair lightly as a yawn takes her over. “You want me to send you some more pictures?”

“I have pictures.” He yawns in response and his arm tightens around her. She’s almost asleep when he hears his statement and it makes her smile wide. She’ll miss this part of him too. “I’m taking the scrubs though.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mindycray17 this took a turn for more funnyish smut, but if you’re still looking for angsty smut see like most of my back catalogue, or the piece from nursetookers for the SOTU ficathon: The Fight Hope you don’t mind - it’s still definitely Mature.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the [The Mindy Project Fanfic Extravaganza, State of the Union edition, bonus edition](http://alittlenutjob.tumblr.com/post/108847153982/the-mindy-project-fanfic-extravaganza-state-of)  
> 3 of 3.
> 
>  
> 
> _Anonymous asked: Will you do angsty Mindy please_

It’s too much some days.

She can feel it all around when she steps into him and kisses his temple, trying to help him forget. The spectre of every person who ever failed him trails behind him like a wake, and when he stops moving they crowd around him. Around them both.

She brushes the broken promises away from his brow, and for a moment she sees his real smile. She sucks from his lips the hurt that gathers in his throat and chokes him when he wants to say  _stay_.

One day she’ll let him down. She knows that. He’s waiting for it. She knows that too. Sometimes she wonders if she  _will_  stay. Then she undresses him, peeling away the moments of his life when someone who loved him left him, and his body feels real under her hands and lips. Trust spills out of him and washes away the ghosts for a moment and Mindy fills his tender ears with new words true. _I’m not going anywhere._


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick post ep with Dot and Annette. It's always been an interesting dynamic, and the episode just made me feel a lot of things about Dot's position in that family.

"You got any brandy?"

"What?" Annette sounds far away on the front porch, the cold air seeping too far into the house. She’s saying her goodbyes to the good doctor, and Dot has to admit that she’s more than a little impressed that the guy stuck around, what with the slapping, and the eel that flopped out of the tureen unexpectedly only seconds after Daniel slammed the door and dinner ground to a halt. 

Dot pours a second cup of coffee, same as the first, leaving room for a drop of brandy. Just in case. She carries both cups out with her, and hands the blue one, the one with the faded white lobster printed on the side, to her friend. “I thought we might top these up. It’s been a busy day. With the guests and all.” 

She hesitates to say his name, a name that had almost dropped out of their vocabulary over the years. That first six months after he’d skulked off into the night, she’d probably heard his name often enough to fill the rest of a lifetime.  _If I ever get my hands on Alan Castellano, Dot… I don’t know what I’ll do. You’ll take the boys if they send me down for it, right?_  But they didn’t see him again. The boys were fine without him. Annette was fine without him. Better without him. Seeing his face tonight shouldn’t even mean anything, not after all this time, but it did. It worries Dot, but what is there to say? It’s not her fight.

A small smile touches Annette’s lips, but she’s unusually quiet. “I put the brandy in the crystal bottle we got from that estate sale up in Northport. I thought it might add a touch of class to dinner. Robbie calls it ‘postprandial drinks.’ Sounds fancy when he says it though.” Annette nudges her arm. “How about that?”

"Sounds like a sex thing if you ask me," Dot mumbles in reply. "I’ll go get the bottle."

"Don’t bother, I’m coming in." Annette looks over her shoulder one more time before she steps inside behind Dot and pushes the door shut. 

For just a second Annette’s eyes settle on a picture and Dot has known her too long to think that it’s the doctor on her mind now, or even the garbage formerly known as Alan Castellano that makes her frown. Dot puts a hand on her friend’s shoulder, just briefly and squeezes. “Boy, Daniel ran out of here fast, huh?”

Annette smiles. “I can’t believe he didn’t know. I mean, you gotta know something’s up if Mindy turns down wine.”

Dot finds herself smiling back. “She’s gonna get so fat and she’s gonna be so pissed about it.”

"Yeah."

"Danny will take care of her though. He’s a good boy. Not like his dad."

Something familiar flashes behind Annette’s eyes, but the smile never falters. “No, not like his dad.”

"Come on then, grandma," Dot takes a sip from the mug to make space for just a little more brandy. "Let’s celebrate."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry so sloppy, just one of those "it's midnight, but I'll write this real quick" impulses.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mature. You were warned

“Alex, this party is WAY too cool for us!” 

She can barely hear her own voice over the pound of the music, but it probably doesn’t matter because they’re already past the bouncers and Alex is being swallowed by the crowd. She looks around nervously, feeling underdressed and overheated and completely out of place. She’s definitely not been drinking, but the heat and the sound and the way everyone just seems to melt into each other is making her feel out of control. Mindy Lahiri does not belong in a club like this. 

Just as the panic starts to set in, a gentle hand lands on her bare shoulder. Her first instinct is to shrug it off; she’s too sweaty and she just wants to go home. He’s hotter though, and the heat in his fingertips spreads down her arm and out into her chest and neck, and she feels instantly looser and lighter. Mindy turns toward the owner of the hand to find herself swept into strong arms, the warm hand now resting in the small of her back. She eases into his lead and he guides her body with the perfect confidence of a trained dancer.

He’s barely any taller than her, but the way he holds her makes her feel small and safe in the crowd. As she leans into him and breathes deeply, his lips brush across her cheekbone. He smells familiar and it makes her heart pound so hard she can’t tell if her next move is courageous or insane. She pulls on his arm, dragging him away from the dancers and into a darkened hallway to push him against the first wall she can find. 

He doesn’t hesitate, pulling her face to his and kissing her like a lover, like he knows what she likes. Even so, she’s taken by surprise when he spins her and pins her to the wall, kissing her again with more heat. His knee presses between her legs, and his fingers dance up her thighs, chasing the hem of her dress as it rides up. She’s parting her knees so he can get closer when she realizes with a start that she’s not even wearing underwear, and that she is probably way out of her depth now. She should stop this, push him away and find Alex and get the hell out.  _Or_  she can just this once do exactly what she wants to do and find out if his intimate knowledge of her desire extends beyond a kiss.

She’s basically riding his thigh as his body rolls against her and the bulge in his pants makes the decision easy - she makes a mad grab for his belt, tugging it free and popping the buttons open with a deft twist of her hand. He has a firm grip on her ass and he’s already lifting her a little and positioning himself as she frees him and guides him straight into her with an embarrassingly loud moan. As the heat rises she thinks she must be having some sort of out of body experience because she, Mindy Lahiri, is getting fucked up against the wall of some random club, by a guy whose face she hasn’t even seen in the light. 

Suddenly, he’s slowing down even though she’s painfully close to coming, and as he pulses inside her he whispers her name. She’d know his voice anywhere.

“Danny?”

“Yeah?”

Mindy jerks awake. It only takes her a second to figure out where she is and what just happened. The lounge is dark and hazy, and sheer panic seizes her body as she flails around for something real. Her hand hits the table and she can hear her glasses skitter off across the floor. “Shit.”

Just as she starts to scramble off the couch to try and find them, a man’s voice stops her in her tracks. “Hold on, Magoo.”

Mindy can smell his cologne for real this time as he leans close and puts her glasses in her open hand. “Danny?”

“I said yeah the first time. You always talk in your sleep?” He sounds grumpy, which is annoying as always but a little bit comforting under the circumstances. Surely if she’d said anything… _revealing_  he’d be less irritable and more amused. He loved a good reason to make fun of her.

“Sorry. I couldn’t see you.” She rights herself on the sofa and takes a minute to clean her glasses with the hem of her shirt. Her heart is pounding again. She hopes the lounge is dim enough to hide her blush.“And I’m too young to understand your reference.”

With her glasses on she can see him roll his eyes at her.  _Jerk._  Of course she’d get stuck on night call with the him. He was pretty handsome and all, but they’d been working together for months now and he  _still_  acted like he was just so above everything. He didn’t answer group emails, he flat out refused to go to her Oscars party and if she had to listen to him rant about how no one watches PBS anymore he was  _not_  invited to her Emmys party.  _Why him? Why not British McCrumpets with the perfect dress sense or that hot orderly who helped me_ _find my car keys when I dropped them in the trash last week. Why this arrogant, rude…_

“Will you stop staring at me?”

She jumps a little at the interruption in her train of thought. Now he sounds amused and  _she’s_  irritated. “I’m not staring at you. I’m just waking up.”

“Sure.” Danny takes a bite of an apple and she wonders where it came from, worried for a second that she’s still stuck in the dream. But no, he probably just brought it with him in his dumb messenger bag because no one is this irritating in a dream.

“I wasn’t. I just had a weird nightmare.”

“Didn’t look like a nightmare.”

“Well it was.” Her voice is too high, she sounds too defensive and she feels her cheeks get hot again.

“Relax, I don’t wanna hear about your dumb dream.” He picks up his bag and stands in the door of the lounge to finish his apple and drop the core in the trash.

Her heart is finally slowing down when he turns one last time with a wide grin and something in his dark eyes that makes her stomach clench. “I don’t know who Alex is, but he sounds like a lucky guy. Night.”

"Screw you, Danny," she whispers to absolutely no one as the warm feeling in her stomach moves south.

The next dream is even better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In response to a prompt given to jsmapdi on tumblr: Pre-series: A flustered Mindy heads to work after waking up from another Danny sex dream. ;)


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From a tumblr prompt: _Danny and mindy picking out baby names_

“Anthony Francis.”

“Danny, you always say that. How is that your opening bid? Do you not know how negotiations work?”

“I’m sorry, but I really like it. It’s Italian, it’s Catholic…it’s everything I like in a name.”

“Danny, as much as you clearly want a mini-me, you need to remember my baby is Indian. And Hindu. I think. Can he be Catholic and Hindu? Damnit.”

“Sure he can.” 

“Wait, what? How do you know?”

“I asked. Last time Rishi called? And you were in the bathroom puking?”

“Really? I love that.”

“So we agree? Anthony Francis?”

“I didn’t say that. You can’t trick me just because I have pregnancy brain.”

“Fine. You want an Indian name?” 

“Maybe. Give me some suggestions.”

“Uh… Rishi?”

“We are  _not_  naming this baby after my brother. Wait, is Rishi the only Indian name you know? That’s racist.”

“I don’t know that many Indian people other than you.”

“You’re a  _doctor_ , Danny.”

“Hey, now  _that’s_  racist.”

“No it is not! It’s an observation.” 

“Jesus Christ.”

“Even I know you’re not supposed to take the lord’s name in vain. Don’t listen to him Mindy Jr.” 

“You gotta stop calling him that. You’ll confuse him.”

“What? You don’t know his life.” 

“Fine. But we gotta call him something.”

“How about Danny Jr.?” 

“Uhh…no. I, uh… no. How about Alfredo?”

“Like the pasta?”

“No, like Al Pacino.”

“Al Pacino is really Alfredo Pacino? My whole life is a lie.”

“It’s a good Italian name.”

“We’re back to that?”

“You pick then.”

“How about Harry?”

“From  _When Harry Met Sally_?”

“Um. Sure.”

“You mean the kid with the goofy hair don’t you?”

“Harry Styles is not the kid with the goofy hair. He’s got the voice of an angel. And a sweet little caboose to boot.”

“Don’t talk like that in front of the kid!”

“He can’t hear me.”

“Then I can swear.” 

“No you can not! You’re a terrible example to Harry.”

“Speaking of… Ma told me I had lanugo. Not like the blond kind. Dark. So don’t freak out if this kid really is hairy.” 

“How hairy, Danny? Oh  _god._  I’m so hairy and you were born a freak and our baby is basically going to be a werewolf!”

“Like mother, like son.”

“Danny! It’s not funny.” 

“Maybe we shouldn’t call him Harry. You know, just in case. So he doesn’t get bullied.”

“Danny, he’s a Castellano. He’ll be tough. Don’t worry about that.”

“What did you say?”

“He’ll be tough. Plus, Morgan can teach him some prison stuff and he’ll put those basics in their place.”

“Not that part. The other part.”

“He’s a Castellano. What? Danny, are you crying?”

“No!”

_“Danny_.”

“Maybe. Say it again.”

“He’s a Castellano.”

“Yeah he is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think now we know a bit about why I don't write baby stuff. But it was nice to feel like writing for once.


	15. Mindy and Peter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was an immediate reaction to the finale, posted on tumblr that never made it here.

“Peter.” The word cuts off unexpectedly, all the other words caught behind the lump in her throat. She’d almost, almost made it through the rest of the party with her dignity in tact, and thankfully the “Manhattan meat train” as Morgan so beautifully put it was gone by the time she’d gathered herself and left Danny’s room. The ride home was oppressive, but she’d reminded herself over and over as she sat in the suffocating silence that she was responsible for another human life now and grown ups don’t run away after a fight. They’d learned that the hard way in Stanford.

Stanford feels so long ago now.

“Min, what’s wrong? Is it the baby? Are you okay?” The click of a lamp echoes down the phone line and she can hear Lauren in the background asking what’s wrong. Humiliation and sheer envy curls Mindy’s toes. Peter has it, however flawed it is, that thing she wants and needs so much. Someone is going to call him husband soon, and he’s going to try to live up to the title.

The phone is too warm in Mindy’s hand, like she’s been talking for hours, when really she’s been hiding in the bathroom of the apartment next door playing Sugar Smash while Danny sleeps and dreams whatever it is that Danny dreams. Not fairy tales for sure. “I can’t do this by myself.”

“What can’t you do by yourself? This better not be a booty hooty, because Lauren is right here. Unless she’s into this.” His voice is a little muffled as he turns away to talk to his fiancee. “You up for this, babe?”

Mindy laughs in spite of herself, the tension unravelling from around her chest as she listens to Peter and Lauren argue briefly before he returns to the phone. “What the hell is a booty hooty?”

“You know, when you late night call someone to  _talk you through it_.”

“Phone sex? You thought I called you for phone sex?” Mindy rolls her eyes and grins.

“Why else would you call this late?” He sounds a little serious and the misery comes rushing back in like a tide.

“Danny doesn’t want to marry me.” Her voice is a whisper, as though Danny could hear her through the walls. She’d even shut the door to the bathroom when she’d snuck out of bed and into the extra apartment. Like they needed any more doors between them right now. Like there was any reason to hide from someone already hiding from you.

“What? Of course he does. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. He’s gonna lock that down, it’ll just take him a while. Think about how long it takes him to eat a sandwich. Or how long it takes him to eat  _other things_. You like that about him. He’s deliberate. He’s not really the "make snap decisions” kind of guy.“

"Damnit, stop being a gross boy for a minute and be my best friend. This  _is_ deliberate. He’s thought about it. He told me tonight. He’ll buy me a ring or whatever, he just doesn’t want to get married.”

“Well…” The adrenaline of a late night call is clearly wearing off because Peter is sounding a little wearier and blearier now. “Is it really that important?”

“You tell me. You’re the one getting married next week. Is it important to marry her? Or was it just the next step?”

He’s quiet for a minute, like he’s really thinking about it. “It’s important.”

“Exactly. I’ve known since I was a little girl that I was supposed to meet the man of my dreams, and we would get married and we would stay married. Forever. Danny has always known this about me, and now that we’re in the position we’re in he won’t even think about it.”

“How do you know that?”

“He told me. Tonight. At a surprise baby shower. In front of everyone. And you know the worst part is that I should have known. He says we’re a family but we’re not. We’re just two people having a kid.”

“You know that’s not true.”

“Do I? Because we barely made it through this year. He wouldn’t let me me his mom, he refused to come meet my parents. He only proposed to me that one time because of the baby. He doesn’t want a family, he just wants to keep the incubator happy.”

“Okay, so what does the incubator want?”

“I want to get married, Peter!” She can hear how shrill she is now and suddenly cares a lot less about whether Danny can hear her. She’s mad. She’s allowed to be mad. “I want the ring and the ceremony and the gifts and the drama. I want to stop speaking to him for a week when he tries to make me take his last name and then take it anyway. I want to start every tweet with "my husband” and I want to file our taxes together and I want to share the same headstone when we die.“

"Okaaay.”

“I’m serious, Peter. I want him to call me "my wife” and mean it.“

"I don’t know what to tell you, Min. That’s the guy you picked.”

“Did I though? Or are we just in this situation because I can’t remember to take the pill at the same time every day and he got worked up over novelty glasses?”

She can hear him open a door and when he comes back on the line his voice is much softer. “Mindy, I can hear Henry and I gotta go get him before he wakes up Lauren, but I am gonna say this. You remember when I made you go to Danny’s office and look through his weird treasure box?”

“Yes. I have a bald spot from that.”

“Oh please, your hair was already half imported Korean hair anyway. You’re fine.” 

Mindy stops herself before she interrupts him again because he’s got that tone he gets when he’s about to say something that he’s actually thought about. 

“Anyway, all I’m saying is that his box of weird stuff only had four things in it. His family, his faith, his hometown and you. He’s a weird guy, our Danny, but above everything else when he decides that he loves something he never wavers on that. You saw it too, and you did pick him. You ran up like ten flights of stairs for him.”

“104 flights.”

“Seriously? You are not in good enough shape for that.”

“Screw you, Peter.”

“My point is that you picked him. You climbed the Empire State building like King Kong for him. Whatever it is between the two of you is the forever kind of thing. So, don’t let today’s troubles dictate tomorrow.”

“Wow, Peter. That’s really deep.”

“That wasn’t me. That was Pube.”

“Pete, you gotta talk to him.”

“I know.” He sounds a little sad and for the first time in hours she feels a lot less sorry for herself and more sorry that she isn’t there to help her best friend. “I gotta grab Henry. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Unless you still want me to talk you through it real quick.”

“Ugh, gross. Good night. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

She opens the bathroom door quietly and wonders why Danny never painted over the stupid ‘Casa de Peter‘ above the door. Maybe he’d kept it for her. Maybe he’d kept it for himself. It was easy to forget how Peter had become a fixture not only in her life, but Danny’s as well. 

She takes her time as she locks up and walks back through the apartment. Their apartment. It looks so different now, and so exactly the same as that first night she’d been here and they’d argued in the street like a couple of spaghettiheads. She tries to picture them in the brownstone - brighter colours, a nursery painted like jungle, a real garden that she herself never has to touch - and the picture is as clear as it was before tonight. Peter was wrong, Danny does make snap decisions sometimes. For her. 

He’s sleeping soundly when she crawls back into bed, curls plastered to his head. He’s sweating, even in dreams. He curls toward her as she burrows into the blankets, his palms warm where they land on her back. She picked him, and he picked her. 

She dreams of the Empire State Building, and a treasure box that won’t open for her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to add a couple of companions to it, but never got around to it, so I'm throwing it into the mix tape.


	16. Borderline

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for city-bright, a little season 2 angst

_What the hell am I doing?_

She watches him disappear through her window, her unexpected wedding guest. A groom awaits her on the other side of a door and she’s hanging on the curve of a smile that’s not really hers and a future that only ever appears in the distance on a night like tonight, distant and unsteady like a star.

She reminds herself as she climbs over the windowsill that every day she’s put between herself and that final night in the lounge has been hard won, and that letting herself return to whatever this had been is a luxury she can’t afford. She’d settled into a new life with the good pastor, and the need of the people had slowly drawn out the poisonous hope of fingertips brushing through her hair as lenses fell into place and her world drew into focus on eyes dark with intent never spoken.

It’s hard to linger on a moment that never really happened when right in front of you are the realities of preventable disease and overwhelming pressure to do much with little, and she’d been grateful for the time and distance that now seems to have dwindled into nothing in the space of only a moment or two stolen on a fire escape.

She’d almost forgotten him in the heat of an early Haitian spring, but then his letters had landed like snowflakes, instantly recognizable and fleeting in their comfort. It was hard also to know if the peace that settled on her when she read them was the note of home they carried, or if the chord struck was something harder to identify and harder still to forget.

The sheet held awkwardly to her chest trails down her leg and her footing shifts. The fabric slides across polished boards, pitching her into the closet, but big, warm hands catch her. They hold her steady as she pulls her other leg through the window. There will be a bruise on her knee, but that’s a worry for tomorrow. Right now the only thing that aches is her pride.

 _You try'na bust your face open?_  he asks. His grip on her arm is tight, and he holds her in place long after the threat of a fall has passed. She meets his eyes, because looking away is another kind of truth she doesn’t want to tell. At least this way he knows she heard him, and he knows that she doesn’t need him to catch her ever again. Another man waits for her only a few steps away, and when she goes to sleep tonight she’ll be free of this. And  _happy_. Of course she’ll be happy.

He looks away first and he leaves her to change into her glad rags, change into the last thing she’ll ever don before she leaves this old life she’s been trying to shake off since she was old enough to believe in princes. The white dress is ruined, but she was never a white dress girl. Her mother would have insisted on red, she thinks, but she hadn’t waited for her mother’s wisdom. Her best friends would have closed ranks around her and built a new dress from the remains of the old like fairy godmothers, but she’d chosen to do this without their giggling, familiar warmth. 

She just has Danny Castellano, and the way he looked at her when she wore scrubs, once upon a time.

She knows as she slips them on that she’s making the wrong choice for the man who waits patiently at a makeshift alter with a paper banner and flowers picked up from newsstands. He’s looking for the girl who glitters and laughs easily. Which is who she is, sometimes. Maybe not tonight though, but they’ll muddle through.

The music starts and she turns the handle, her wedding march ill chosen she realizes too late. Why didn’t she pick a song about forever, or a song about happily ever after?

_Something in the way you love me won’t let me be_

Her heart pounds and she looks at her husband-to-be. If she looks straight ahead she can let this old life go, she knows it.

_I don’t want to be your prisoner so baby won’t you set me free_

But  _he’s_  looking at her again, the way he always does, his dark eyes burning through to a heart she can’t share with him now. A heart that he never even asked to have. She knows in this moment he’s finally giving her the only gift he has left. It makes the tiny concession she’s made on this day feel less like a betrayal and more like treaty. The way to end this in peace.

He’s never asked for glitter, or easy smiles.

He only ever asked her to wear blue on her wedding day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From a prompt: I was re-watching AMPSF, and I heard the line "something in the way you love me won't let me be" from Borderline, and I was wondering if you could write a Dandy fic based on that. I know there are many ways to interpret and write it, but I'd love to hear your take on it, if you're willing (and in the right mind set) to write it


	17. This Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From a tumblr idea proposed by sippingpoison: What if Danny was the one to call Cliff to come back when he left during the Christmas party because he just wanted Min to be happy?

He knew her plan wouldn’t work. Danny knew the chances of her Christmas party sex trap succeeding were about as likely as Guiliani ever being mayor again, but when the music started and he watched Mindy falter and fade away from the room when her desired audience failed to materialize, he felt his own heart break.

He’d forgotten about this part of love, the part where someone else’s dreams start to taste like your own and someone else’s disappointments cut deep enough to kill. It wasn’t like this before, maybe because back then he’d thought Christina loved him too, and when the things they’d wanted darted out of reach he’d had an ally.

He picks up his phone and scrolls through the contacts, choosing one even as his heart breaks again. She could never know.

“Hey, buddy.”

“Oh, hey Danny.” Cliff’s voice is tinny and strained down the line, like he’s not really holding the phone to his mouth.

“I thought you were going to come to this thing at our office.”

“Yeah, I stopped by. It wasn’t really what I thought it was going to be. Sorry. I’ll catch up with you later or something.”

“Oh, yeah? What were you expecting?”

“I don’t know. It sounds stupid, but I was really only going to come because Mindy asked me to. I kind of thought Mindy wanted me to…” Cliff’s voice trails off, then comes back much louder. “You know what, it doesn’t matter, she’s dating someone, and I have Heather.”

Danny feels it in his gut, that forced brightness in Cliff’s voice. “You and Mindy, eh?”

“She’s just… I don’t know what it is about her. She does these crazy things and I don’t know… it makes me want to be crazy too? Like I said, it’s stupid.”

Danny wants so badly to say goodnight and let Cliff think whatever he’s going to think, but he can’t shake the thought that maybe Cliff would finally make her happy. “Yeah, I get that,” he says.

He pictures Mindy alone in her office, a little drunk, failure and embarrassment chewing at the edges of her.

If he was the guy, the one she’d wanted when she’d sat at his kitchen table in his sweatshirt eating his french toast, then he’d be in there right now telling her…that he loved her? No that’s dumb. That he wanted her? That all he wanted for Christmas was her? God she’d get a kick out of that. It would be worth it just to see her face when he said it.

But he wasn’t the guy. The guy was on the other end of the line saying something about Heather’s apartment.

“Cliff, wait. Don’t tell her I told you this, but Mindy wanted you to come tonight. Uh, tonight was one of her crazy things. She thought you’d see her all dressed up and hear her sing…”

“Wait, she’s singing?”

A little frown creases Danny’s brow. “No, she decided not to do it. Because you’d already gone.”

“She was singing for me?” Cliff’s voice is hushed, and Danny realizes he’s probably already in Heather’s building. Mindy’s building. He could just stop talking now or say nevermind and Cliff would go back to his girlfriend and Mindy would forget about the whole thing by new year.

He’d done this dumb thing for her Secret Santa, and he wasn’t even sure he could do it when the time came. She’d sent around a link to her Amazon wish list a month ago, but he’d gotten this idea that maybe if he did something  _big_ , it would be better than a JuiceMaster she’d use once and never clean or cashmere socks she’d lose in a week. He’d been trying to get his gift right for weeks now, but right here in his hand was the opportunity to give her the one thing she really wanted.

“Yeah, it was for you. The whole thing.” Danny clears his throat. “I don’t know what the deal is with you and Heather, but if you think that whatever it is with Mindy is real… you should come back.”

“Whoa.” Cliff’s quiet and Danny thinks for a minute that he’s gone, but his voice comes back and he sounds relieved. “How late is the party going?”

“Uhh, I don’t know. Mindy’s kinda given up on the party thing, so I’ll be here cleaning up probably ‘til 1am.” As soon as he says it Danny knows how he can keep Mindy at the party long enough for Cliff to get back. “Tell you what, if you can be back in less than an hour I can keep her here.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I, uh, I still gotta give her a Secret Santa gift.”

“I’ll be there. Just keep her there as long as you can. I’ll be there.”

Danny closes his eyes and tries to swallow the horrible lump forming in his throat. “Great.”

“Should I bring flowers or something?”

“What?”

“I mean, Mindy’s all about romantic gestures, should I bring flowers?”

“Nah, we’ve always got flowers here. Get her something she can eat.”

“Like what?”

“I dunno, bring her a sugar cookie or something. The whole party is gluten-free and she hasn’t had a cookie in hours. She’ll love it. I promise.”

“Thanks, Danny. I don’t know how I can repay you.”

“Just don’t tell Mindy I told you. She’ll yell at me, it’ll be a whole thing.”

“Sure.”

The call ends suddenly and Danny stares down at the image on the screen. The pulsing synth of Last Christmas begins to play and Danny’s suddenly seized by the memory of last year. Her hand had been so warm in his, her face tearstained and resolute. He couldn’t rewrite that for her, but this year Mindy Lahiri would have her perfect Christmas.

He pulls up the music player on the phone and carefully selects a song then shoves it in his pocket. The handle is cool under his fingers as he opens the door. “Min?”


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Repost from tumblr

She gets stuck on the button.

Maybe it’s not the button, but the way the button hasn’t been pushed all the way through the hole. She’s not immune to the bare chest, or the fine sheen of sweat on his skin. She’s not immune to the hair that she knows for a fact grows softer as it trails down his belly - but her eyes lock on a glint of brass that peeks out from blue denim like a half-finished thought and she forgets for a second why she’s standing in his doorway again.

“Put a shirt on, Danny!” Her hands fly out in front of her to shove him the way she has a thousand times before, but nanoseconds before her hands hit his chest she tries to pull them back, resulting in an awkward collision. As her fingertips brush against Danny’s bare stomach she can feel his abs tense in surprise. And god help her, she accidentally touches the button.  

“Whoa! What are you doin’?" 

Mindy curls her fingers away from the fly of his jeans and nervously smooths her skirt. "I’m not doing anything. Why are you dressed like that?”

He looks away and licks his lips the way he does when he’s nervous. Then she remembers the phone call, and why she’s here, and what he’d said, and what was kind of funny down on the sidewalk feels a little less funny now. He folds his arms. “What do you want, Min?”

And there it is. A single syllable dissolves whatever tension lingers in the wake of a little inappropriate touching.  _Min_.

Why’d she do this? They’d almost nailed this friend thing, and she’s supposed to be somewhere to meet someone who never told her she was his best friend then broke her fucking heart anyway. Smart girls bet on themselves. 

“Fix my hair.”

Danny shakes his head and stalks over to the kitchen island; she follows and settles herself on a stool. His fingers land lightly on her shoulder as he clips the gum out of her hair. Mindy thinks as his hands draw away that she should have insisted he put on clothes before they tried this, but the candy in her hair kind of sucks the potential sexiness out of the moment anyway. That and his attitude. “Stop chewing gum, you’re not 10 years old. Or carry scissors around with you.”

She spins to reply, but Danny’s right there in her orbit. This time when they collide he’s the one with his hands in the wrong place and his left hand is almost cupping her right breast. She sucks in her breath. “What the hell?”

“Okay, that was obviously an accident.”

His breath smells minty, but this close she can also catch the lingering scent of tobacco. “I don’t think it was.”

“How do you figure that?” His voice is low and something in her own throat hurts now, like she needs to cry or maybe she needs to sigh, but it’s not something that she should be feeling.

Mindy leans in to his neck and lets her reply flow across his skin.. “Because you’re still holding my tit, dummy.”

Danny jumps back and wipes his hand on his jeans. “You’re one to talk. You put your hand on my dick the second you walked in the door. Is that your thing now. You just going straight for the junk now, cuttin’ out the chit-chat?”

She narrows her eyes. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

His eyes travel up her body slowly, like he’s seeing her for the first time tonight, and the hours she spent picking this outfit suddenly feel like a waste because he’s not seeing it. Somewhere in the back of her head her brain is shouting that she didn’t pick this outfit for him, that she has somewhere to be. But right here in the half-lit kitchen she can’t hear it over her pounding heart. She’s pretty sure all he’s seeing is the way she looked in the steam room, and the office, and maybe sometimes when they let things get a little heated a million years ago. Like he had any right to that memory now.

Mindy’s head clears a little. What would Nicki do? She’d slay men too weak to love her is what she’d do. Screw this. “Danny, I’ve got to go.”

He nods and backs away so she can stand and collect her things. She smooths her skirt again, self-consciously.  “Thank you.”

His Adam’s apple bobs like he wants to say something, and honestly she wants to say something too, but what else is there to say?  She didn’t make this mess. Mindy tucks her bag under her arm and reaches for her jacket when he’s there again, in her space, breathing her air.  “Choose me.”

Danny doesn’t touch her. She can feel him vibrating with the effort not repeat mistakes that had set them back too far.  _She_  gets to choose this time.

That thing they say about a bird in the hand is probably true and it’s hard to think about what might happen on top of the Empire State Building with a stranger when whatever is happening right here has dark eyes and a lot of muscle on display and a history that neither of them can ever really walk away from. “Why, Danny? A nice guy wants to get to know me, and he actually tells me things he thinks instead of waiting for me to figure it out, or springing it on me when he gets too scared. Why would I choose you over him? Why would I choose you over anyone?”

“Because you love me like I love you.”

“What?”

“I mean it, Min. I messed up that night. And I’m probably messing up right now, but the only thing I think I can get right, the only thing I wanna get right is me and you. I love you. I wanna be with you.”

His eyes hold hers and it’s all she can do to breathe. They flick to her lips, and suddenly memories come back, of a night he let her go. He didn’t say it then, and she carried the weight of that with her in Haiti. It was exhausting. Is this just how they are? Do you gamble your life on years of  _almost_  and one declaration of love?

For the second time she lets herself get caught up in details. He’s not wearing shoes, but he is wearing dress socks. He’s perfectly cleanshaven and for some reason it just reminds her of how he looks in the morning before he shaves and the stubble is silver below his lip and he’s too rough to kiss. His soup bowl is unwashed in the sink (really, Danny? Soup for dinner?) like he was in a hurry. None of the pieces really add up, but do they have to add up?

She could have stopped anywhere to get a pair of scissors, or used the nail clippers in her bag, and she turned up here. He tried to send her away with what was obviously a lie, but she pushed her way into his apartment anyway.

And absolutely nothing about tonight had been platonic, or easy or honest. Except his words. He loves her. She knows it for truth, because it’s her truth too. She loves him. And smart girls bet on themselves.

This time Mindy’s hands move with purpose. They glide easily up Danny’s arms as he pulls her to him. They trace along his hairline as she holds his lips to hers. They skate down the planes of his back to rest at the waistband of his jeans. 

“I love you too,” she whispers, brass warm and smooth under her fingertips. 

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me at: http://alittlenutjob.tumblr.com.  
> As always feedback is really appreciated.


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